I'm at work. I have no access to YouTube, so I can't link or embed a song. So you'll just have to take my word for it.
Drive-By Truckers "Birthday Boy"
It's well worth your while.
Like any great song, the opening line "Which one's the boy / She said I ain't got all night..."
Combine that with the dirty, crunching guitar introduction and you can envision how utterly unromantic the scenario is.
That is all -
But what a great way to start the weekend
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