England

Yesterday, I put my weimaraner down. Words can't come close to describing the joy he brought into my life.


For a good amount of the day, I was playing The Beatles' "Blackbird" - mainly for the lyrics "Take these broken wings and learn to fly" and "All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to be free."


Then, a stronger feeling gripped me. I remember hearing the second to the last song on The National's High Velvet album. I remember feeling drained when I listened to it, but in a good way - like a purging.


Matt Berninger's vocals may be more articulate than most indie lead vocalists, but his baritone can sometimes send you to a lyrical website to decipher some of the lyrics. Little did I know the first refrain pretty much summed up this entire day:


"Someone send a runner through the weather I am under for the feeling that I've lost today" -


To say that I've lost a feeling is an understatement. But honestly, what better way to phrase up this day than that statement? Feelings are one of the most important elements in being human, and the thought of one of those feelings that are part of your makeup being lost - perhaps never to be found again - is like losing a part of your self.


The song's focus is someone who has moved (fled?) from a previous area. The song's protagonist flatly observes "You must be somewhere in London / You must be loving your life in the rain."
As someone who has routinely thought about moving/fleeing my home state, I can readily identify with lines like " You put an ocean and a river between everybody / Between everything, yourself and home."


Though this has little to do with the opening refrain, the final refrain is staring me in the face for the next few days : "afraid of the house / stay the night with the sinners"
I'm not looking forward to the next few days - going home not to see a dog on the couch. Feeling that "I need to get home and let Jake out - I've been gone for almost six hours" - and then realizing you no longer have a need to go home.


"England" doesn't sum up what I'm feeling right now. But it shows that sometimes, and entire song isn't necessary to sum up your feelings. Sometimes a simple refrain is all that's needed.































R.I.P. Jake